Monthly Archives: September 2013

Cure #3 for Postpartum Divorce – Find a Rock Star

Those Difficult Squats Again

Those difficult squats are still a challenge for me. It has been eight months since I started at CrossFit but I’m starting to notice some improvement in flexibility, stamina and strength but depending on any given day, some days I feel on top of my game and other days I feel very frustrated with myself.

The Perfect Squat.

The Perfect Squat.

While doing my warm up exercises this morning, I had to do 3 sets of 10 squats:  my absolute least favourite exercise. I’ve asked more than one coach at our CrossFit centre what it is I have to do to improve. Bottom line: PRACTICE.

Cure #2 for Postpartum Divorce – Find Exclusive Islands

 “Nights and days came and passed

And summer and winter
and the rain.
And it was good to be a little Island.
A part of the world
and a world of its own
All surrounded by the bright blue sea.”

Margaret Wise Brown – The Little Island

 

A Stiff Lower Lip

Cure #1 for Postpartum Divorce – Part 2 – Find a Boat

I found a boat but I also found myself landlocked and restless.

Self-determination comes with a price tag and it’s not cheap. Thrust back into the precarious world of singlehood I was suddenly sailing solo and without a clear compass course.  Like a true snow bird I packed up and headed south to Florida craving for distance from the dark and freezing New England winters and the melancholy memories that they held. I was anxious to hone in on my new life, whatever that was to be.

A three year stint teaching English to wealthy South American students proved to be almost impossible during the steamy spring and summer seasons in the sub-tropical Florida panhandle.  I was physically knackered and grew increasingly aware of a nagging ache in my gut that refused to go away.  I deduced that I still needed some serious down time to sort out my postpartum divorce blues  and the place to do this was at sea, on a boat.

Cure #1 for Postpartum Divorce – Part 1 – Find a Boat

“Hard times build determination and inner strength. Through them we can also come to appreciate the uselessness of anger. Instead of getting angry, nurture a deep caring and respect for troublemakers because by creating such trying circumstances, they provide us with such invaluable opportunities to practice tolerance and patience.”

The Dalai Lama

Boats are  metaphors for life. They carry us through fair and foul sailing weather. If we are willing to seek  and reflect they will reveal the answers that dwell deep within ourselves.

Four Cures for Postpartum Divorce:  Solutions That Worked for Me

I Found Myself a Boat

Recovery from a failed marriage or relationship  is an angst-laden experience for most couples. Some of the horrific scenarios in my own marital breakdown could have probably found a place in director Danny DeVito’s dark comedy, The War of the Roses. This “gutty little production” as described by film critic Gene Siskel, illustrates how effectively you can impart pain to your partner when you know exactly what buttons to press. The good news in the film is that the abrupt ending spares the couple from postpartum divorce depression. Most marriages don’t end with this kind of finality.